Friday, February 20, 2009

Silence Please...?

I have not felt like sharing much lately. (Noticed that this blog post started with negative sentence…not good, hum).No specific reason really. I have been reading, doing yoga, meditating (not every day though), doing chores, cooking, doing pretty much regular day to day mundane stuff but not feeling like communicating much. I was analyzing it in my mind but did not really discuss it with anyone until it was brought to my attention by none other than dear husband.(Aah! how I can always count on him to point out things which are just not right.).He seemed to think that I have become less communicative, more angry and depressed because of perhaps yoga and/or meditation. I plead guilty of being less communicative for sure but do not necessarily agree with the other two. Nonetheless, it made me think long and hard about it and at least ask myself some questions.
I am no longer the happy cheerful person that I once used to be. It is not as easy for me to make new friends as it once used to be. I find myself craving for peace and quiet all the time. I know peace is not being in a calm and quiet place with no noise or sound of any kind but on the contrary it is being amidst of all the chaos, noise and hustle and bustle and still be perfectly calm within. A person practicing yoga and meditation should be or ought to be oozing with energy and enthusiasm, happy and cheerful isn’t it? The person should be full of love and compassion.
I am not saying that I am cruel, hateful or other negative extremes but I am not a picture of tranquility either. I should be putting a lot of effort in trying to understand the other people’s point of view and have an open dialog instead of avoiding to deal with them at any level. Make it a point to open up and talk about my feelings and what I have been thinking about with people who I know truly care. When having a conversation with friend or relative, pay close attention and really LISTEN to what they are saying instead of just nodding and appearing to be attentive while being completely in a different inner world of my own. Get more involved in life and spread joy around which will give me joy in return and make me that person I once used to be.
Practicing yoga and meditation to find the inner bliss does not mean that cutting yourself from the world and living on an island but actually making your world blissful by spreading the joy around.
“Give to the world the best you have and the best will come back to you!”


arun.goel said...

Hi Ms Random Thought,

what you have written in your post is very true. I have personally experienced it. Initially, when i started meditation, which i am not doing these days, i myself felt to be left alone. I gave less attention to other things like indulging in gossiping, watching tv and even movies.And, thats because there is no greater joy in being intrinsic rather than being extrinsic. What i realised was that, okay i am aware of my thoughts while i am meditating, say for an hour, but i need to be aware of my thoughts and actions while i am not meditating too. It is of no use if i am angry or jealous or gossiping during rest of the day.

Random Thoughts said...

Thank you for your comment.
I guess we tend to be like pendulam which keeps moving between 2 extremes before it find the center. We all take our time to find the golden median. For me it is too much talking and then not enough communications at times..Some day I will find the balance I hope :)