Yesterday I went to the hindu temple to listen to "Parmahamsa Nithyananda" talk about Patanjali's yoga sutras. he spoke about 16th sutra and everything related to "Vairagya" . "Vairagya" is not detachment but transcending from both attachment and detachment.Another concept he tried to hammer in was that there is no logical connection between the object/person/thing experienced, the person who experiences it and the experience itself. All these 3 are independent of each other. In other word, if I eat a sweet and get a certain joyous feeling, it is not going to be consistant. I keep on eating 10 sweets and the experience of joy may turn into something not so joyous anymore. Same thing holds tru for person. When we are in love, we like everything about the person we love but the experience changes over time inspite of the fact that 2 people involved in a relationship are the same. We all need to understand this fact and try not to hold on to any specific kind of experience which make us happy or try not to run away from things that cause negative feelings. It was an inspirational discourse.
Afterwards there was a BIG line for energy darshan(I am not sure what one is supposed to feel or say at those since it was my first. They told the audience to ask for any healing if needed.) I did not ask for any healing(since it was very crowded and everyone got about 3-4 seconds with swamiji) but my heart was praying for my father to be healed from rhumatiod arthritis and my mother-in-law from her knee problems. I did not want any healing for myself since there is nothing to be repaired with me at this time. But oh boy, I came back home feeling sick! I called in sick today and did not go to work. My throat is hurting and so are my ears. So much for healing :)
May be just that my mind was not open and receptive. Who knows. But I remember the joy and excitement I was feeling while driving to the event. I expected to be feeling even more elated returning and I guess it was the opposite of my expectations. I guess it all boils down to practicing no expectations and no judgment.
I shared this account with Sue Chadwick(I attended the meditation workshop led by her last month). She told me not to view this as a negative result of that evening. I will quote her word below which really brought tears to my eyes.
"Some times after these spiritual gatherings, we release "stuck" energy or karmic seeds that must be released so we can reach Higher states of consciousness...."
May be I am over analyzing everything. It could be jsut that somethign is going around and I caught it from the crowded temple that evening.
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2 comments:
I am loving reading your blog. What profound comments you make! I can relate to a lot of your experiences with your teacher training. It is such a learning process - about the self, more than anything else.
Thank you. It is an ongoing journey for sure. I would love to read about your recent experiences in shiva training. Hope you pen them down.
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