Random Thoughts

Some times we grown ups unnecessarily complicate things and make it sound too complex. I have to share conversation I had last night with my 6.5 year old dear daughter who will be addressed as DD in the rest of this post.

Its been a long gap since my last post.

Arriving to this space after a long gap. The last post of this year. Days just keep crawling but years fly by. Time to reflect on the past year.

The Yoga Saga Continues....

Dear Dhanashri, It has come to our attention that a Mr. Govinda Vishnu from Pasadena, Texas, is contacting yoga studios and schools throughout the country, both YA registered and unregistered, implying that he represents or acts on behalf of Yoga Alliance. We understand that persons contacted by Mr. Vishnu are told that the type of yoga they teach is not a pure form of yoga, is a violation of YA'sCode of Conduct and that YA will be bringing a lawsuit to close their studio or school. Yoga Alliance has also been advised that Mr. Vishnu claims to represent an organization named Gitanjali International, which he claims is the supreme authority of yoga and the only official yoga registry in the United States, Canada, South America and Europe. He further asserts that if those he contacts do not comply with his demands he will bring legal action against them. Mr. Vishnu is not affiliated with Yoga Alliance in any manner. His unwelcome and misleading communications are of deep concern to us. We are exploring our options with law enforcement authorities in Texas and at the Federal level regarding Mr. Vishnu's statements and threats. Should Mr. Vishnu make contact with you please contact me on our toll free number 888-921-YOGA (9642) to report the incident, and should you feel threatened by him please contact your local police department. Sincerely, R. Mark Davis President & CEO

I have been following Linda's yoga blog for a few months and have been reading a few other yoga blogs(American) along the way.

I see a lot of things written about the yoga in the west . There are arguments and counter arguments. There is actually a debate going on about American yoga, the branding of yoga in different styles.

I could not stop laughing after reading a comment on Brenda's blog post . The commentator mentioned that during a discussion after a yoga class a gentleman(who is from India but living the USA for over 20 years)said that

“You Americans make everything so dramatic! It’s only stretching.” I really agree with that comment, about dramatizing things. Sure YOGA is much more than stretching, as you go deeper in your practice, you move from just the asana practice towards more meditative aspects of YOGA. But the key is, as a teacher, one should be able to dilute the YOGA dose at the level of one's students. Giving students the knowledge they are ready for, gradually.

If a YOGA class does not involve pranayam or meditation session it is still YOGA. Just like explaining kids about an apple falling from a tree is physics and teaching astrophysics/ nuclear physics to Ph D students is still physics.

I grew up in India, attended YOGA classes taught by my Aunt, by Iyengar teachers too. I came across couple of different styles of YOGA but never ever witnessed any such arguments/discussions/debates about YOGA not being YOGA just because teachers do not give a dose of spirituality. There wasn't any kind of one-upmanship. There were no lulu lemon yoga clothes(now this may be a case of sour grapes, since I simply can't afford those :), but on a serious note, even if I had disposable income I would not feel comfortable wearing those things ).Forget the fancy YOGA clothes, I had not even seen a yoga mat back home.

When I voiced my opinion on Linda's blog post, she said that because in India, yoga is just yoga, there is no need to make it sexy. SO, all this debate/discussions/style/formats/philosophy of yoga just to make it sexy? Who would have thought! Can't really argue with that one. Let the saga continue…To each its own!

Last week had been quite busy at home. It was the last week of my parents visit. My younger sister also was visiting along with her husband. We had a full house. Lot of talking(even snapping at each other), lot of cooking, lots of eating out, lot of shopping.

The last few days of parents or in-laws visit are always hard on many levels. I wish I could say that their trip was really nice and very memorable in every respect. They really had a wonderful time and they are looking forward to the next trip already. It would be really nice not to have any regrets about my own behavior with them in past 7 weeks. Sadly, it is not so. Sure they enjoyed their visit. Sure I enjoyed getting a break from cooking, cleaning, bathing and dressing up kids etc. But, in my heart I know that they were not exactly happy. I used to snap at them for seemingly insignificant reasons. It must be really trivial things because I do not even remember any particulars of the various incidents. They are my parents and I know they will easily forgive me and wont hold any grudge whatsoever. But that does not take the guilt away.

I keep on analyzing my behavior and in theory I completely agree with my husband that our parents are not getting any younger and we have to let go of the little annoying things that they do or say. It is not possible for them to change themselves at that age. We have to adjust and accommodate . I think I know all the theory of it but just have a hard time putting it in practice. When I try to adjust and accommodate and try not to snap and yell, I tend to go in my own shell and become aloof. So, when will that time come when I can HAPPILY, CHEERFULLY adapt to my surroundings?

I want my family to get the BEST of me and not the worst. I DESPARATELY need to learn to put others need before my own needs. I need to learn to let go of all the sarcasm, bitter and hurtful comments , self centered attitude and practice LOVING KINDNESS.

I am at the starting point right now and hope I never ever come back to the square one.

I ( very  enthusiastically ) enrolled my dear daughter(will be referred to as DD here after) for the dance class. She started going without much complaining.  I had to go with her  of course and sit there for an hour and watch the class , keeping my younger one's activities and noise level down while the class was in session.  In just a couple of weeks my enthusiasm level was considerably low.  Its just pain to take the kids to different activities and sometimes push them to do all those things.  I had to nag my DD to get ready in time for the class, nag some more to practice dance at home. She did not even practice once. Pretty soon I started dreading Thursdays. Then I thought of giving up the dance class. I asked my DD if she would like to continue and she did not show any interest. I made up my mind and called the teacher and pulled her out of the class.

One of my close friends got extremely upset at my decision. She is of the opinion that I should just push her a little and continue with the class. She also said that I am pulling her out just because I hate to drive every week to the class. I agree in part that I really do not like that chore. But at the same time I also know that had my DD shown even slight amount of interest and enthusiasm then I would have taken her to the class every week.

DD is happy about not going to the class anymore even though her 2 close friends are going(YEY she is not giving into the peer pressure, might be a nice thing in teens). For her the best part of the class was taking the "ghoongroos" off! I still do not feel at peace with my own decision. Should I really push her a little more and make her go? I don’t know what I am worried about. I certainly not the fact that my friends may judge me based on this.  I have been giving it some thought. It took me to my childhood in Pune.

Me and my sister used to go for "bharatnatyam" dance class. We may have gone for a few months before calling it quits. My sister said that she did not like to do the steps that teacher taught and wanted to do her own steps.(That's EXACTLY what my DD told me, talk  about history repeating itself).  A few years ago, I was talking to my mother about our childhood and hobbies etc.  I do not have a single recreational activity or talent like singing, dancing, playing any instrument or any other arts or crafts thing. During our conversation I blamed my mother about it and told her that she should have pushed us a little harder and made us go to the class even against our will back then. That way, today I would know some art form. My mother did not defend herself and just took the blame.

That brings me to the conclusion that I must be afraid of my DD growing up and blaming me for not knowing "kathak" dance.

I have  come a full circle  indeed!

But where do I go from here? May be I can enroll her again after a couple of years if she shows any interest again. For now, I just enrolled her for swimming lessons. That should take the guilt away for a while I guess!

And most importantly, I have to say this out loud, "I am so sorry Aai(mom) for blaming you".